Handling a Death Anniversary

After cremations services, you and your family will undertake one of the most difficult processes we go through in life: grieving and recovering as you adjust to a new normal – and a different life – without your loved one.

While you and your family will take a lot of big steps toward adjusting, adapting, and moving forward after your loved one’s death, you will likely find that, as the first anniversary of your loved one’s death approaches, many of the feelings and emotions that you experienced when they died seem to come back in their original intensity.

The first thing you and your family need to know is that this is completely normal. The death of a loved one is a very traumatic event and a devastating loss. However, there are some constructive ways that you and your family can use those emotions and feelings so that you can also experience comfort and solace.

A very therapeutic way to handle the feelings and emotions you’re experiencing on your loved one’s death anniversary is to write them a letter. You may find this to be comforting, because you can pour out your heart to your loved one about what you’re feeling.

Tell your loved one how much you miss them. Tell them what you miss about them. Remind them of special moments of your time together. Tell them how much you love them. Tell them how different things are with them gone.

Let your loved one know all the news about you and your family in the year that they’ve been gone. Talk with your loved one about all the challenges you’ve faced in their absence. But don’t forget to tell them about the successes you’ve had as well.

Sometimes talking about the struggles and the failures we experience without our loved ones gives us some needed perspective on the lessons we have learned and the growth we’ve experienced from them.

Let your loved one know that it’s been hard to move forward without them, but you know that they would be proud of every step you’ve taken in the last year, no matter how difficult each one of them was.

A great way to handle the first-year anniversary of your loved one’s death is to do something in their honor. Your loved one cared about and was passionate about certain things during their lifetime. Choose one (volunteering in the community, gardening, visiting with people who are older or who are not feeling well, etc.) and do something to acknowledge your loved one’s life and their death.

You can also host a potluck dinner for your immediate family and close friends on the one-year anniversary of your loved one’s death. The burden of providing food is shared among the attendees, enabling everyone to gather to eat and share stories and memories of your loved one.

Consider creating a new tradition with family members to commemorate your loved one’s death anniversary. It doesn’t have to be anything elaborate, but it should be something special you do together on that day only. This is not only comforting, but it ensures that no one is alone on that day, which can often be hard.

Finally, be gentle with yourself on this day. The last year has been difficult and your life has changed forever. But you’ve done well in weathering, enduring, and overcoming the challenges that came with the death of your loved one.

Access to grief resources is part of the cremations services we offer, so you can depend on our compassionate and experienced team at Hopler & Eschbach Funeral Home to help you.