Social Media Reminders after a Loved One’s Death

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After cremations as part of our cremations services, you may face one of the toughest challenges in going through the grief process, and that will be how to deal with social media. There are many aspects to social media that will directly impact your grieving process. One of those will be Facebook memories reminders.

Our data – what we share, who we share it with, who we friend, who we tag, when we do it – is the engine behind Facebook. Facebook has a feature where it reminds you of past posts you made on the same date as today. These may go back as far as 10 or more years, if you created your Facebook account when Facebook became available.

Some of these Facebook memories will include pictures, anniversaries, birthdays, or holidays when your loved one was still active and living, or they may include a wedding or engagement anniversary, or they may even include the date your loved one died.

These reminders can be the trigger for very intense and unexpected grief, sometimes even years after your loved one has died, because you’ve forgotten about them being on Facebook, but Facebook hasn’t forgotten. Facebook memories can literally blindside you.

How you respond to the same Facebook memories reminders as time passes can help you know how far you’ve come through the grieving process. In the first few years, Facebook memories reminders of your loved one may cause intense grief. However, as time moves on, those same reminders may elicit good memories of happy times and the incredible life you shared with your loved one.

A good coping strategy for Facebook reminders with your loved one in them is to go back and recall the event of the reminder. Focus on the fun, the love, and the good time you and your loved one had when that event happened.

If you get a Facebook memory reminder of your loved one’s birthday, you could have a few close friends and family members over to celebrate your loved one’s birthday with a meal where you can share stories about your loved one.

Sharing Facebook memory reminders of your loved one with friends or family on Facebook enables them to reminisce and share their stories and memories. It also allows them to comfort, support, and encourage you. You’d be surprised, even on a digital platform, how comforting it can be to remember that your loved one was not only important to you, but important to a lot of other people as well.

You also have the option, after your loved one dies, to change their Facebook profile page into a memorial page where friends and family can come and tell stories, express grief, and express happiness. This is a personal choice that you can make. You don’t have to do this, and it is fine to just deactivate or delete, after backing up their data (Face has instructions) your loved one’s Facebook account.

Even though handling Facebook memory reminders may be hard initially, you will find that over time they bring more smiles and good feelings than tears and pain. They will no longer surprise you in a negative way, but they will delight you in a positive way.

Access to grief resources is part of the cremations services we offer, so you can depend on our compassionate and experienced team at Hopler & Eschbach Funeral Home to help you. You can visit our funeral home at 483 Chenango St., Binghamton, NY 13901, or you can call us today at (607) 722-4023.